We’re having January in August.
    Unless you’re reading this in September.
    Then just pretend that August part said September.
    You probably read at a 4th grade level anyway so you definitely meshed the first two sentences together so we’re on the same page, I think.
    Since the longer it takes for me to announce who the HBGWHEM 11.0 is, the more of a chance that I’ll put this off until September and then I’ll have to rewrite my opener, I present to you HBGWHEM 11.0 January Jones.
January Jones,HBGWHEM,HBGWHEM 11.0,unrepresented author,myspace.com/thebr0wnbunny,Hot Blonde Girl With Heavy Eye Makeup,Hot Blonde,Heavy Eye Makeup,Mad Men
    (Image courtesy of GQ not knowing I’m using it.)
    I was going to wait until January Myspace Blog sweeps week to feature January Jones because that’s how we do it in the entertainment business. If you have a creative thing like “It’s January month in the month of January!” then you won’t get fired from your marketing job because you created a slogan and that’s pretty much the only part of your job. You just have to think of a sentence that isn’t like “Murder Your Children in January” and you can keep your desk and paycheck.
January Jones,HBGWHEM,HBGWHEM 11.0,unrepresented author,myspace.com/thebr0wnbunny,Hot Blonde Girl With Heavy Eye Makeup,Hot Blonde,Heavy Eye Makeup,Mad Men
    This month’s HBGWHEM just so happens to work at an Ad agency that sells cigarettes and girdles and other things that were roaring in the 60’s, but have lost popularity in modern times and we’ve donated all our supplies to white trash people.
    Now I’m not totally caught up on Mad Men, since I don’t have cable, but I’m pretty sure January’s character is still alive. I have to watch everything on DVD so I’m always behind the collective TV watching world and people give me mean looks when I ask them stuff  like “Who do you think shot Mr. Burns? I think it was Smithers.” When I asked that last week, people reacted like I just asked if Dawson would get Joey in the end of Dawsons (Don’t tell me, I’m still on season 5).

January Jones,HBGWHEM,HBGWHEM 11.0,unrepresented author,myspace.com/thebr0wnbunny,Hot Blonde Girl With Heavy Eye Makeup,Hot Blonde,Heavy Eye Makeup,Mad Men
    January has also had her share of trouble with the public.
    Back in June, January was caught doing the teal cab of shame home in the same dress that she wore at the Oceana World Oceans Day Party held at West Hollywood’s Sunset Towers. Now I don’t know anything about this party, but if I was a guy and I took a girl to the Oceana World Oceans Day Party held at West Hollywood’s Sunset Towers, she would probably be bored after like ten minutes and I would have to make a small, but respectable donation to the dolphins or whatever is being saved there and then I’d have to apologize for such a boring night the entire ride home. The the girl would then lock herself in her bedroom and update her status with something passive aggressive and I’d be super bummed that I thought any girl would ever like such a stupid event.January Jones,HBGWHEM,HBGWHEM 11.0,unrepresented author,myspace.com/thebr0wnbunny,Hot Blonde Girl With Heavy Eye Makeup,Hot Blonde,Heavy Eye Makeup,Mad Men
     Since January didn’t have a date at the Oceana World Oceans Day Party held at West Hollywood’s Sunset Towers, she probably had a same reaction as my fictional girlfriend above did. Because she couldn’t blame anyone for dragging her there, she had to find some guy to hook up with to make things not boring.      She succeeded with making the night not boring and the paps caught a picture of her coming home in the same dress she wore to the Oceana World Oceans Day Party held at West Hollywood’s Sunset Towers. The picture ended up in all the rags and people seemed to look down on January because I guess it’s improper for a girl who plays someone in the 60’s to go out in the 10’s and get deep dicked. Obviously HBGWHEM does not judge January for this. The Oceana World Oceans Day Party held at West Hollywood’s Sunset Towers sounds shitty and sex is awesome. January was making an executive HBGWHEM decision and we fully support her.
January Jones,HBGWHEM,HBGWHEM 11.0,unrepresented author,myspace.com/thebr0wnbunny,Hot Blonde Girl With Heavy Eye Makeup,Hot Blonde,Heavy Eye Makeup,Mad Men
    Then she got in trouble again when she was eating with some chef (I think he’s famous, but I don’t have the cable to check the channel guide to see if he has a show) and I guess she drove into a car, drove home, then called the cops. Everyone wanted her to be arrested because that’s what they are trying to do with all HBGWHEMs so that ugly brunettes can get jobs. Luckily, January was able to go free because she’s a really good drunk driver. Plus everyone saw that story about her getting out of the taxi after the non oceanic sex romp and so they know she takes taxis when she is too drunk from the night/night before.

January Jones,HBGWHEM,HBGWHEM 11.0,unrepresented author,myspace.com/thebr0wnbunny,Hot Blonde Girl With Heavy Eye Makeup,Hot Blonde,Heavy Eye Makeup,Mad Men
   One thing is true, January Jones is a talented hot blonde girl with heavy eye makeup. In fact, I am of the belief that January got into that car accident because her own intoxicating beauty filled up the car she was drunkenly driving home.
    In conclusion:
January Jones,HBGWHEM,HBGWHEM 11.0,unrepresented author,myspace.com/thebr0wnbunny,Hot Blonde Girl With Heavy Eye Makeup,Hot Blonde,Heavy Eye Makeup,Mad Men


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