26.1 Madonna - Super Bowl Tour Review

OKAY MADONNA FINALLY FUCKING PERFORMED AFTER I HAD TO SIT THROUGH SPORTS FOR 19+ HOURS. She did Vogue and she was dressed like an Egyptian or something and I’m like 90% sure that Egypt is in Africa and I think that it was prob like a salute to her son she got from there or w/e, such a good Mum!!
It was great b/c they had dancing Vogue covers, which looked shitty so it was obvious that they were dancing American Vogue covers!! So Madonna was like *British accent* “I am pro-Africa and pro-America at the same time, like world peace and move 2 the music.”
Then next there was a guy who was doing circus shit on a rope and it was like a parody of football I think because he’s like “LOOK AT HOW GOOD I AM DOING POINTLESS BULLSHIT” ~backfilp~. Then Madonna went over to see LMFAO and she danced with them for a while because she wanted to appeal to the LMFAO demo (aka stupid cunts who buy Gaga merch).
After that they took a piece of Madonna’s outfit off, but you didn’t see pu$$y lips or nips or anything so I was like =( but NBC was probably happy. Madonna performed either her new single or some dumb Gwen Stefani song, gonna have to google my factz, but she was doing lots of good dancing and she had like M.I.A. on the stage because I think people were like, “Madonna is so full of herself and an egotistical bitch,” but then people were like, “Oh, wait, no there is M.I.A. and she’s even more full of herself and her music is also shit so I hate her way more”. M.I.A. flicked off America because she hates world peace. Nicki Minaj was also there so Madonna can appeal to the current VH1 crowd of urban youths like she did to the old VH1 crowd of menopausal unhappy housewives.
They did some good palmpalms or w/e b/c I guess it fit in with this football meme, but seriously Mr. Gisele doing football was the longest set for an opener ever and it didn’t seem worth it in the end. I thought it was over since Gwen Stefani never came out, but then they went into “Like a Prayer” and an overweight black guy came out to sing with her because, from what I’ve seen about football, overweight black guys are the ones who are very involved in the game. I’m going to start a campaign about skinny boys and I’ll be like, “WHY DO I ONLY SEE ONE BODY TYPE IN FOOTBALL. FAT FUCKS R THE ONLY PPL CONSIDERED FOR FOOTBALL. THAT IS BODY RACISM.” I will find football tumblrs and be like “Y do you only post overweight football players, ur giving peewee footballers bad body images and they will get eating disorders where they eat like 4 plus meals.”
All in all, Madonna danced better than any of these other pop bitches could and she put on a fantastic show!!! I have nothing else to do so I’m going to watch the post-madge jock thing. Here is my liveblog of that (click)